stay furiously alive
A true relationship is two imperfect people refusing to give up on each other.
Here is Kat Malickay: I am a courageous and passionate Relationship and Couples Communication Coach. I transform relationships focussing elevating their communication dynamics and igniting their passions to make support couples feel alive. In addition to this, I am certified by Tony Robbins as a Strategic Intervention Expert. Therefore my approach is intelligent, courageous and challenging. It essentially combines effective forms of strategic action and communication from a variety of disciplines. Above all I always make my clients feel at ease. And I am the only couples coach in the UK who speaks 7 languages who lived in 6 different countries. Hence I have an exceptional cultural awareness. Furthermore I have an outstanding knowledge of multicultural, casual, gay, open, polygamous, long-distance, asexual, as well as sexually fluid relationships.
My coaching is unique because of my own love story. My story proves that if we are ready to overcome difficulties, everything is possible in the game of love. It is fundamental for me to show up authentic, listen to understand, and being fully invested in my clients energetically. That means going where others would hesitate to step and constantly challenging.
In summary my key three coaching pillars are:
coaching- kat malickay
couples communication coaching- kat malickay
Couples Communication Coaching in particular focuses on all forms communication. Namely it includes all forms in which two people interact and connect in their relationship. As a rule, it is key for me to make my clients feel at ease, at home, relaxed. Hence it will not surprise that my couples coaching approach intentionally and intelligently increases love molecules in couples. To sum up- it makes them feel good and supports them in engaging with each other during memorable moments. As a result, these make them feel alive, playful, appreciated and understood. Because it is our little daily decisions which significantly shape our relationships and change our lives.
Under my coaching wing you will always feel like a team.
I definitely believe that human connection has transformative power beyond all areas of our lives. Therefore the quality of our relationships is directly correlated with the relationship with ourselves. I thus selectively work with couples who matter to each other, truly care about each other. In addition to this they are ready to learn how to carry each other’s negative emotions. And thus both are invested in our sessions- energetically as well as financially. Although most of my private clients want to reconnect again, there are some who are just looking for a common ground. In fact, some simply seek sensible advice on how to get through a divorce.
”Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change”. [Stephen Hawking]
Whatever your goal is, we always work as a team whilst I transform the way you see each other by:
- Bringing you in your element so you own your sexuality
- Cultivating a feeling of vibrancy and vitality
- Making you feel particularly good and confident about yourself and especially each other
- Learning to always feel comfortable being uncomfortable
- In essence finding yourself again and celebrating your identities separately as well as a whole
- Singularly redefining your identity as a couple but in a revolutionary way
- De-cluttering your relationship and letting go of stories which don’t serve you
- Searching for the erotic again in new and unknown territories
- In addition profoundly deepening your connection across multiple layers
- Elevating your communication flow significantly to a sophisticated level
- Starting to say no freely, yet lovingly and confidently
- Significantly improving your resilience as a unit as well as improving the overcoming of constant change
- Coupling love and desire besides making it sustainable
- Generally awakening your creativity to spice up your relationship
- Teaching you that having pleasure every day is beyond magnificent
- Showing you that temptation, imagination, intuition, curiosity and particularly mystery are fundamental in eroticism
- Together getting rid of hurtful, ineffective communication habits
Stories don’t always have happy endings.
People usually crave happy endings. For this reason, since our very early years, the tales and stories we are told as a rule end fairly. Hence the good wins. And the truth prevails. Then a lesson is learned. However it is not just Cinderella who lives happily ever after. Similarly, romantic comedies always end on such a high note. They furthermore make us feel warm inside and enforce our faith in positive outcomes. So notably in the 21st century, couples marry swiftly and divorce even faster. Yet overall we see a trend of fewer European marriages. Accordingly, there is exponential expectations placed on our chosen companion. Not only are they our best friend, lover, husband or wife, but also father or mother, soulmate and protector. We also we want them to represent our holistic counterpart. And fulfil us emotionally, sexually, romantically, intellectually, spiritually and forever.
Consequently it is not surprising that many partners give up sooner or later. Firstly, the beaming erotic flame vanishes. Then they roam about, floating through their relationship day by day. Till they sink. Secondly, many couples are too busy to stop and appreciate their closest person. Thirdly too demotivated to gift them with their full presence. Finally, lovers too quickly jump to conclusions about how imperfect their partner is. Above all, they believe ‘the one’ miserably failed to provide for them what they have promised. They fail to deliver every one they were meant to be. Next couples get bored. Soon they feel dead inside. And so they subsequently start focusing on other thrills which keep them alive.
coupling love & desire
coupling love & desire
”It’s hard to feel attracted to someone who has abandoned her sense of autonomy”. [Esther Perel; Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence]
If only we accepted and welcomed our failures and break-ups as opportunities of massive growth and organic change.
Especially stop beating ourselves up for making wrong choices and trusting the wrong people.
Most importantly we would stop placing sky-high expectations on people we love.
Perhaps we would feel more energetic and more alive.
Could it be that you are also directly experiencing one or more of the below gaps in your relationship and it limits your happiness? Namely, these are some of the main reasons why partners seek Relationship Coaching:
Perhaps relationship coaching is what you truly need? Take a look at my coaching menu here:
the loving molecule
The mysterious hormone oxytocin is certainly being seen as a brain chemical that does a lot more than just bring us closer together. Often referred to as the love molecule, low dosages of it are being released multiple times daily. For example when we hug or touch someone- in both ourselves and the other person. This hormone is furthermore associated with helping couples establish a greater sense of intimacy and attachment. It furthermore increases the desire for couples to gaze at each other. In addition, it produces sexual arousal and its the primary factor for bringing about an orgasm, during which the brain is literally flooded with it.
“One thing that you can’t fake is chemistry.” [Blake Shelton]
But oxytocin isn’t just limited to helping couples come together. It’s an indispensable part of childbirth and mother-child bonding. Besides the above, this fascinating molecule is often responsible for inducing feelings of happiness, empathy and generosity. It also increases confidence, building trust and even helping in healing a damaged relationship or letting go of feelings of anger or distress. Additionally, oxytocin, through its anti-inflammatory properties can also be used to relieve pain, heal wounds, reduce cortisol, blood pressure as well as improve digestion.
The love molecule is not only about the good times though. It also plays a key role in relationship insecurities and in times of a crisis. Researchers found that when an individual feels that their partner is losing interest in their relationship, in consequence levels of oxytocin increase.